Sweetness and Light in the Library
Thraxton library, under the aegis of Miss Prunes, is always the centre of gossip, scandal and slander. And when Miss Prodnose and Miss Snipe finish picking holes in the other members of the library choir, they can always bitch at each other.
PRODNOSE But, Miss Prunes, how did you think the choir sounded last night? I thought the altos were terribly unbalanced.
SNIPE Unbalanced! What can you expect with Mrs Alton singing so loudly? I was standing next to her and I couldn’t hear myself at all. But at least the altos were singing the right notes, which is more than can be said for the sopranos.
Ah! What a wonderful thing is Harmony.
Which reminds me...
How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one. He holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
How many basses does it take to change a lightbulb?
None - they are so macho they prefer to walk in the dark.
Mr. Profundo is the bass soloist of the Thraxton Village Choir. As Mr. Profundo himself says, "we basses carry the tragedy of the piece". And his admiring wife agrees.
Not everyone is quite as admiring, of course. Mr. Carmichael the tenor refers to Mr. Profundo as 'the singing bear in the next room', and explains why all basses have beards: "It’s something to do with voice production I believe, the notes get lost in all the hair and eventually emerge several tones lower."
However Mr. Profundo and Mr. Carmichael do have something in common - both are under suspicion of murder!
Performances of Aperitivo's MURDER IN THE CHOIR: June 1st at the Casa do Povo, Moncarapacho; June 14th and 15th at the Museum, São Brás.
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